Earlier this week, P and I celebrated our seventh wedding anniversary. I’m a lucky gal — I got one of the very, very good ones. One of the true keepers.
{No, I’m not asleep at the altar here. Just camera-shy.}
I feel like we look so young in our wedding pictures. I’m going to go ahead and blame my kids for aging us so rapidly. At this rate, I will soon be as unrecognizable as Nick Nolte was at the Oscars. {Was it just me, or did he look like Kenny Rogers? It’s kind of a bad day when the Mug Shot Nick Nolte looks better than the Real Nick Nolte.}
Anyway, it was right about now, seven years ago, when we arrived here for our honeymoon. The moment when our jaws dropped in awe.
Tahiti. The end of the Earth. The most magnificent place I’ve ever seen.
That’s our room in the photo. I’d love to go back someday, but it’s never going to fucking happen highly unlikely — at least before our kids go to college. Or even during. Oh, but maybe after they’re done and we scrap all of our retirement savings. OK, so that’s only, what, 19 years from now?
I mention the honeymoon not only because it’s on my mind around our anniversary, but also because there is some irony as I pack for a very different vacation — the four of us are off to Florida in a few days. And I can’t help but think about the striking similarities in the preparation process for the two trips. Here, have a look.
In Flight Essentials
–Tahiti Honeymoon: A pile of mindless magazines (Us Weekly, People, Real Simple [pre-boycott], etc.). iPod with favorite songs. Mental list of in-flight movies to see. Cute summer shoes to change into upon arrival.
–Fordeville Takes Florida: iPad loaded up exclusively with various kids’ movies, shows and games. Separate bag with Arsenal of Distractions {toys and books for kids, perhaps some tiny liquor bottles for parents}. Full change of clothes for each of us in the event of producing (kids) or catching (parents) in-flight vomit.
Clothing
–Tahiti Honeymoon: Bikinis, nice sundresses, stylish beach wear.
–Fordeville Takes Florida: Mom Bathing Suit {one-piece, suitable for chasing slippery small children in the water without wardrobe malfunction}, sensible hat and SPF 6,000 for a party of four.
Packing & Prep
–Tahiti Honeymoon: For 14 days and two of us — one large suitcase. Total packing time: 28 minutes. Total time to get through airport security: 43 seconds.
–Fordeville Takes Florida: For eight days and four of us — two checked suitcases, three carry-on bags, a car seat and a stroller. Total packing time: 1.5 days. Total time to get through airport security: 16 minutes and one lost shoe.
Ground Transportation
–Tahiti Honeymoon: Lovely town car sent by the resort, followed by private boat and helicopter transfer.
–Fordeville Takes Florida: Massively crowded airport shuttle, standing room only, with post-flight-vomit kids and aforementioned luggage items. Retrieve mini van from rental lot. Install two car seats.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining about going on vacation. Once all the prep is done and we get past the inevitable Travel Vomit, I’ll be glad for the change of scenery. It may not be the end of the Earth this time, but anyplace that sells ice cream in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s head is more than OK by me.
Just don’t tell the girl in the wedding photo that I said this — she’d never believe it.
Good one Kim. I’m with you.
And I think you mean that Nick Nolte looked the way Kenny Rogers USED to look….damn.
Thanks Greg. At this rate, I’m concerned that the next picture of Nick Nolte will look like The Crypt Keeper.
You are rocking my bloggy world. Fun, witty, fantastic post.
Please note my tactics, they may come in handy. Have enough small children and strollers in tow to scare TSA senseless. The sea of humanity at security will part and let you and your bumbling brood through because, they? They do not want to be stuck with you jokers.
I am a giver, a kind soul, therefore I will lend you my twins. They get constipated easily. Have fun!
I like your plan. {The TSA Shock & Awe part, not the Operation Borrow Twins part.}
Oh lord – yes, this is a thought I return to frequently. Except – my sweet keeper and I have started to switch places — he is now the fast packer, and I’m the slow one. Why, you ask? BECAUSE I am now packing for everyone but the keeper. And don’t tell this man what the obscene luggage allowance to Europe is because he will go ahead and utilize all 350lbs of it. Thank you for the laughs!
Oh yes, I got that memo too: One person now packs for the whole family. How did this happen?
i feel the same way when i look back at our wedding pics, not that i was exactly a child bride, but still the aging has been swift with the arrival of the kids!
i know i’ve said it before, but i say it again… it’s really great you are taking a vacation, b/c i am still avoiding them…