Breaking Up With Adele

“Fiiiiiiiire to the raaaaaaiiiinnnn…”

Ugh.  I change the station in the car.

“Rollin in the deee-eeee-eee-eeep…”

Wait, she’s on another station.

“I wish nothing but the best for yooooooouuuuuuuu…”

And another.

It’s a hostile takeover.  Or at least a clinically depressed one.

We are a nation overdosing on Adele.  And if misery loves company, I’m not sure what to think about our collective mental state.

Well, I’m taking a stand.  I’m breaking up with Adele.  I can’t take it anymore.

At home I can control my Adele intake.  I am in charge.  I can say no.  But the car?  It’s just not a safe zone.  The minute I realize I don’t have a CD of my choice inserted and find that the radio is on — it’s already too late.  I am bombarded with heartache and loss.

Adele has a lovely, lovely voice.  She is super-talented.  And I do love me some of that retro bee-hive hair.  But we have to part ways, for the sake of my sanity and for the safety of the drivers around me.

I realize I may be going it alone here.  And it’s a risky move, especially after finally being sprung from my post-Oprah-bashing Witness Protection assignment.

But here is what will inevitably happen if I am subjected to ongoing Adele overload.



It’s important to understand the risks.  And I think we can all agree that it takes a lot for me to voluntarily spill my coffee.

So if I see any of you driving hazardously, I’ll know what’s happening in that car.  You’re in an Adele Sound Trap.  Just pull over to the nearest shoulder, insert a distracting CD — and disable your car radio for the next 6-12 months.

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  1. Oh my…. I know exactly what you mean. I love Adele, but they play her stuff entirely too often. I also change the station now when I hear one of her songs. Why must radio stations play a song over and over again until your ear drums bleed at the sound of it??

    I enjoy your blog, by the way. I found it….. well, actually I don’t remember how I found your blog. But, I’m glad I found it.

    • fordeville says:

      Thanks Francie — I’m glad you found my blog too 🙂
      I’m also glad I’m not the only one with bleeding ear drums.

  2. Markus says:

    Rumor has it she’s on the radio right now!

  3. christine says:

    I fucking hate Adele and am tortured by her in my spin class and when the teacher inevitably plays it and those gdamn lyrics – the stars above, remind me of, how we almost had it all. Seriously motivates me with extreme anger where I imagine myself running over and over Adele with my spin bike.

    oh jeezus I need help.

    • fordeville says:

      So I think, based on your comment, I should update my post to include the dangers of Adele Overload while spinning as well. It’s clearly not just a vehicular threat.

  4. Saimi says:

    HaHaHa, I do agree they play her a lot, but I have to admit I like her. She’s not only on the radio but at my Zumba class as well so when I hear her I get the pumped up feeling.

    Sorry, I hope we can still be friends! Coming at ya from Kelley’s break room!

    • fordeville says:

      We can still be friends but please don’t hurt yourself at Zumba from Adele Overload.
      And thanks for stopping by 🙂

  5. Erica says:

    Omg I can’t stand Adele! Her songs to me are boring and they don’t move me at all. I think she has a good voice, but doesn’t use it properly (I hate the whole “going off-key on purpose” thing that she does). Needless to say if I catch one of her songs on the radio while I’m station-surfing, I change that station so fast!! Lol! ; )

    • fordeville says:

      I actually think her voice is tremendous. But it’s just too much at this point. I can watch the news if I want to feel despair and isolation 🙂

  6. sparkling74 says:

    Just turn on some country. She’ll never make it over there, right? Found you at finding the funny.

    • fordeville says:

      This is an excellent plan. But I would need a new pie chart on what country music would do to my driving 🙂

  7. Meredith says:

    Well, sure–obviously, in the case of Adele-overload, I would expect nothing less than a 35% lure to escape with the Fresh Beat Band…

  8. Annabelle says:

    That made me laugh. She *is* awfully down, even though her voice is beautiful. There’s only so much of that stuff I can take.

    • fordeville says:

      Good news: After a week in Spain, I can report that there is no Adele there. At least not that I heard. So there is an escape from her somewhere in the world.

  9. Christie says:

    Hey Kim, totally agree on the Adele Overload. Funny stuff…love the chart! Now if you could also advise what to do when that overplayed Gotye song comes on as well. I’m considering scheduling an operation to surgically remove that sucker from brain…

    • fordeville says:

      Oh, *that* song. It’s an ear worm on steroids.
      But I think that’s a one-hit wonder, so just ride it out for about another month and that one should be gone.

  10. Totally agree that she is so overplayed that I am kinda over it, but for some reason it doesn’t bother me that they play Payphone every five minutes!

  11. Monika says:

    I actually can’t STAND the sound of Adele’s voice. Her songs wouldn’t be bad if someone else was singing them, in other words. Except “Rumor Has It.” I was forced to listen to that song in its entirety while buying shoes for work (non-slip shoes that I wouldn’t be caught dead in outside of work), and I wanted to do everything on your pie chart. I wouldn’t spill a drop of precious coffee on purpose either. Actually, more than anything I wanted to poke something sharp into my ears and bash in the radio in the store.

    • fordeville says:

      I might have to amend the pie chart to include “poke something sharp into my ears and bash in the radio in the store” 🙂

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